Here's an excerpt from "The Feeling Buddha", a lovely gift I got from Sue.
"Many of the important things we learn the hard way. Looking back, I can see that the times of adversity have each taught me something which has given my life extra quality and depth, even though, at the time I did not always welcome these challenges.
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Often what we learn from the experience of a less than comfortable life is compassion and kindness.
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When we experience obstacles and hardship, it can go either way with us. We may become bitter and alienated or we may grow as people. Experience broadens us. Difficult experiences challenge us. A person who has always lived in their own country, for instance, may not know what it is like to be a refugee or a member of an ethnic minority.
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I believe that the Buddha's intention was to show us how to be enlightened rather than defeated by all the various situations of life. Affliction we will assuredly meet. He wanted us to meet it well. "
I think that last sentence sums things up quite vividly for me. We will meet affliction/adversity along this journey of life. You can't escape from that. But you can choose HOW you want to meet it.
I keep thinking that I would like to meet it well, that I would like to find that strength and enlightenment inside of myself. I am learning now that it's not so easy. But it is there. : )
9 comments:
"Affliction we will assuredly meet. [Buddha] wanted us to meet it well."
Exactly what was part of my first 'ah ha' momment.
I am so glad that this book is speaking to you. I am so excited!
"We may become bitter and alienated or we may grow as people."
Or? Not possible to do both?
I wonder if feeling bitter and alienated prevents you from truly growing?
Define grow. I think it's possible to achieve something you were not before, even if you are bitter. Bitterness may in fact be a catalyst to great change and isn't that what we're after?
The quote simply demonstrates one of those contradictions that bothers me about buddhism...the openness and acceptance only seems to go so far before the labels come out. It's human nature....I think it's the degree of labelling that is important. And your P.O.V.
I think buddhism means well, but like all human endeavours, those pesky humans get in the way.
I do understand that you feel there is a contradiction. Perhaps what Buddhism is trying to suggest is that if you are experiencing bittnerness, does that not perpetuate your suffering? And does that not become a cycle that feeds into itself? You suffer, become bittner (which may be a growth, I agree) but then you suffer because you are bitter, and then the cycle just continues. At some point, you are no longer growing, or are you?
That's where the point of view comes in. There's the old cliche about artists suffering to create great art. If that is true for some, then perhaps their suffering is where they feel they must be to be inspired, which in turn leads to a creative burst, which satisfies them, but does not necessarily relieve suffering. Round and round.
I so get that! That's a lovely perspective, and it makes sense to me. I also wonder how long that struggle will be positive? how long will it translate into good art and intense creativity, before it becomes something that starts eating away at the artist? before it becomes something that starts to kill them? Can you not say that it the point at which you are no longer growing?
I guess the point is to turn your suffering (inevitable) to your advantage. And that is where I find my original quote to be too black and white.
Rather than "...become bitter and alienated or we may grow..."
I would say "...become bitter and alienated AND we may grow..."
I think you can do both. With the second, you keep part of what you are rather than abandoning what you may be for a completely new road. Yes, some need to change roads, but there's no definte need to change completely who you are to achieve your own personal enlightenment. The "or" version (and the problem I have with some of the buddhism I've read about) sometimes implies complete change instead of embracing yourself and what you really are. I'd prefer a slow morphing to attempting a complete change. It's not right or wrong. Just a choice.
I so very much agree with the last statement. It is all about embracing who we are and moving towards where we want to be - and making it a conscious choice. I really like the way you phrased that.
The thing I like (so far, and I have not read much) about Buddhism is that it does not seem to be black and white, I believe that it can be what you choose to make it. I agree though that in trying to explain something one (humans) can apply labels even with the best intentions.
And I believe that part of what Buddhism tries to teach is to do exactly what you suggested - turn the emotion generated by the inevitable adversity to do something positive.
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