I had a blue moment this morning. It didn't last very long, but it was one of those moments where I feel disconnected from all my friends.
I realized that when I am emotional - for whatever reason - and experiencing sadness - I become emotionally needy. I feel immediately forgotten, which I know is not real, and I feel like I am all alone. That somehow, in some parallel universe, I am living a life without friends or connections. That the connections I have, which generally come so effortlessly to me, are lost. Like someone is stepping on the wires. And the energy I get when I am in contact with people close to me feels broken off, faded, rusted. I feel like I want to be remembered. To be touched.
And, usually, it's at these moments that I find slivers of inspiration. Reminders that I am alone. That I do walk my journey of life alone. And that I have been incredibly enriched and blessed with friends, that they fill my life with laughter and love. But that I do not need them to be whole or happy.
"The best day of your life is the one
on which you decide your life is your own.
No apologies or excuses.
No one to lean on, rely on, or blame.
The gift is yours - it is an amazing journey -
and you alone are responsible for the quality of it.
This is the day your life really begins."
-Anonymous
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